At sunrise Christmas Eve, my mom drove me to the airport from their Southern Illinoisan home. I was excited to finally have a moment alone with her, as we have always been close. The past few days have been a whirlwind. I am one of five children, and in addition to the four grandchildren, most of us had gathered for an early Christmas. The house was packed with people and the usual bustle of a large family holiday gathering.

This particular Christmas has been hard for my family, where an undercurrent of emotions could be felt while socializing, opening presents, playing games, while cooking and such. Behind the laughter and love were feelings of immense relief and gratitude and fear for what the future would hold. Most simply put, my family is extremely thankful that one of us is still here, and it was at this moment when my mother and I were heavy in discussion about it, that we shared an incredible experience. Immediately upon us each speaking from the heart, swarms of birds started flocking above us in the sky as my mom gasped and gripped the wheel of my dad’s truck on a cloudy, country road at first light.

“Look at them all!” my mom exclaimed as she slowed her speed and we rose our heads to the sky to watch masses of birds weave and dance above us moving as one mass as expertly choreographed as The Nutcracker. We were giddy with childlike excitement and gasped at the continued performance, our very own ballet. And when the birds had seemingly passed and we were silent in shock, a second and third act followed with more birds. We stared incredulously at the sky and at one another, wondering how and what we had witnessed, which later was explained by my biologist husband as a starling murmuration.

My mom, who has been very spiritual my entire life, commented on The Big Guy above, and I shook my head in disbelief, but it was at that very moment that I knew. The universe was letting us know that it had taken care of our person. That they were here with us and not in an early grave, and that everything might be okay after all.

To those that may feel hopeless during the holidays or when life feels really shitty, know that you are not alone. You have people that love you, even if it is not people you are related to by blood, and this great big world needs you in it. When your heart is still and open and raw and honest, you might see a sign around you.

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Ronda Churchill is a freelance photojournalist originally from the greater St. Louis, Missouri, area. She currently lives in Las Vegas and is available for hire worldwide.